When Trying to Conceive Becomes Work
on May 06, 2013
by Alyssia Granger
Scheduling sex for your fertile days, trying weird positions, drinking fertility teas, and the general feeling of stress can lead to performance anxiety, resentment, stress, and worry.
Ask any woman who has been trying to conceive for more than a few months. The fun wears off real fast. It can be fun and exciting to try to have a baby at first, and it feels like you are embarking on a special adventure with your partner. But, several months later, it seems like all the fun has worn off, and trying to conceive becomes a chore. Scheduling sex for your fertile days, trying weird positions, drinking fertility teas, and the general feeling of stress can lead to performance anxiety, resentment, stress, and worry. Here’s how to deal with trying to conceive when it’s not fun anymore. Claim Your 20 Free Pregnancy Tests – Click Here
We know, easier said than done, right? But really… if trying is getting to be too much for you, just stop trying for awhile. We know that people always say it will happen when you least expect it, and you will get pregnant when you’re not thinking about it, but that really is true sometimes. Stop scheduling sex for awhile, and put it out of your mind. Just for a few weeks, a month, however long it takes for you to feel better about it. Think of it as a vacation from trying to conceive.
Make sure that you are connecting with your partner in other ways as well. Bring back the romance to your relationship. Go on dates, and just spend some time enjoying each other’s company. If things get steamy and you want to have sex on a day that you’re not fertile (gasp!), just go for it! Make sure that you remember how much you love each other and why you are trying to have a baby in the first place!
We know that often, sex during your fertile time is all about “getting it done”, and checking it off the list, but did you know that when men are sexually aroused, their sperm is more motile? So, making sure that sex is enjoyable for both parties is very important! Don’t just focus on getting it done, make sure that you are both enjoying yourself.
We know, no one wants to hear this part. If you are having trouble conceiving after trying for a year or more, you should see a fertility specialist. A couples’ counselor can also help you to figure out ways to better connect with each other. Don’t be afraid to seek help if you need it, it might just give you the boost that you need!
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Alyssia is mom to 2 giggley twin girls, Sophia and Emma, and son Hunter. She's a Southern girl, passionate about photography, travel and her husband Josh.