New Book Slams Delaying Motherhood

on Feb 19, 2014

by Dr. Christine Lee, MD

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New Book Slams Delaying Motherhood

Whether it be that actress on the big screen, or the mom across the street, more and more women are delaying motherhood, opting to wait until their mid-thirties or beyond to get pregnant. But, what is the risk involved with delaying motherhood?

Don’t wait?

Whether it be that actress on the big screen, or the mom across the street, more and more women are delaying motherhood, opting to wait until their mid-thirties or beyond to get pregnant. But, what is the risk involved with delaying motherhood? A new book slams the decision to wait to get pregnant, and says that the media and celebrities are giving real women the wrong impression when it comes to a woman’s fertility as she gets older, and her ability to get pregnant later in life. Claim Your 20 Free Pregnancy Tests – Click Here

The new book

The book is called: “The Big Lie: Motherhood, Feminism, and the Reality Of The Biological Clock”, and it is written by Tanya Selvaratnam. Tanya says the real disservice that is being done to women today is putting the fictional idea into their heads that getting pregnant after 35 is easy peasy. It does make sense- let’s think about it for a minute. Halle Berry is pregnant at 47. Uma Thurman at age 42, while Mariah Carey birthed her twins at 42. Jane Seymour had twins at 45. It seems like it’s no big deal to delay motherhood, especially in Hollywood, where we are binded by the smoke and mirrors.

Tanya’s experience

“One of the reasons I wrote the book was because I was frustrated by the conflicting messages and information out there,” Selvaratnam said. “We see celebrities having kids seemingly without any problems and we have no idea what they went through. We see the end result, but not the struggle.” The book she writes is a new take on an old subject, something we don’t see or hear about very much. It’s very personal and revealing, but it’s also sure to get people talking. In her book, Tanya shares her own hard journey through three miscarriages, IVF treatments, cancer and the ultimate toll these things took on her marriage.

Plenty of time?

Tanya writes that after her first miscarriage at age 37, her doctor told her that she still had “plenty of time” to get pregnant, so instead of heading straight to a fertility clinic, she kept trying, which she believes proved to be a crucial mistake. She believes that women are being fed a “Big Lie”, in that they are told that no matter when they are ready to have a baby, it will be fine. Women are being told to go ahead, have a career, take your time, do whatever you want, and your eggs will be ready and waiting when you get back. But, Tanya says, that’s not the case at all.

The big lie

The truth is, your body won’t wait forever. Your eggs, they have a shelf life. They deteriorate over time. The best ones are used first, in your twenties, and the not-so-great ones remain. It is actually very rare for a woman over 40 to get pregnant naturally without intervention by fertility treatments. More women need to realize this and face the facts that fertility isn’t forever. It’s no secret that the number of childless women in the USA is growing. In 1976, there were around 580,000 childless women between the ages of 40 and 44. However, in 2008, this number was 1.9 million. It’s obvious that fewer women are having babies, and Tanya thinks that this is because by the time they get ready to get pregnant, they can’t.

Fertility game changer?

Tanya is hoping that her book will be a game changer, teaching women to take charge of their fertility. “We are the guinea pig generation for testing the limits of our fertility, or our chances of having a child. The shock and the lack of preparation when you’re not prepared and the pressure women feel in general about our reproductive selves adds to the shame women feel when they can’t get pregnant,” Selvaratnam said. “When women have miscarriages or infertility we feel like failures. I want people to realize how common these issues are. When you see the statistics, it becomes clear you are not alone. You look at celebs and think ‘What’s wrong with me?’ when it seems to work out for all of these other people. But the truth is, for most people, it doesn’t work out.”

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Dr. Christine Lee earned her Ph.D. in Developmental Biology and Master of Science in Biomolecular Organization. Dr. Lee is Lab Director for ConceiveEasy and is board certified as a High Complexity Laboratory Director (HCLD).

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